


Reminding Me

by puckinginsane



Category: Hockey RPF
Genre: F/M, Reunited and It Feels So Good, True Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-30
Updated: 2018-05-30
Packaged: 2019-05-16 04:09:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,323
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14804072
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/puckinginsane/pseuds/puckinginsane
Summary: A mini fic based on the song "Reminding Me" by Shawn HookThey thought that breaking up was the right thing for both of them but six months later they find themselves missing each other more than they thought they would.





	1. It should be you instead

[Her POV]

11:30 pm

12.24 am

1:13 am

2:47 am

It's obvious I'm not getting any sleep tonight. Same as last night. Same as the night before. It's been the same thing for six months now. Sleepless nights. Sleepless, lonely nights. Lonely even though the last two months I've had someone next to me. It's not the same. Not the same as what I used to have, what I used to have with someone else. I pick up my phone for probably the 600th time tonight. No new texts, not that I was expecting anyone to text at this time. Everyone is sleeping.

I'm watching a terrible movie on my iPad, headphones in so I don't disturb the guy next to me, my boyfriend. It's still fairly new, I'm not used to calling him that quite yet. This movie is so terrible I've been tuned out for a half hour now, but I have to finish it. I've already invested my time into it. It's not like I have anything else to do anyway.

I pick up my phone once again. I bet he's awake. I shouldn't text him. I deleted his number, but I have it memorized, etched in my brain. It won't help either of us if I text him, but he's been on my mind lately. The more I'm in this relationship, the more I'm reminded of what I no longer have. It's stupid. I'm happy and he's great, but he's not Tyler. I never felt like this with Tyler, even at the end. How can I feel so alone when he's so close?

I look around social media. Twitter, Instagram, Facebook. There's nothing new from the last time I checked five minutes ago. I'm trying to keep occupied, trying to keep my mind in other places, anywhere but where it is right now. Thinking about my ex boyfriend. Missing him. I'm trying to fight it. There's a reason we broke up. The reason escapes me right now. But there was one. I swear there was.

It makes me laugh how comfortable he looks next to me. Tyler bought these sheets for me. "I swear they will change your life," he said. I thought he was crazy, but he was right. I had the best sleep of my life on these sheets, until he was no longer the one next to me in them, Now someone else enjoys them and I can't fall asleep to save my life.

I wonder if he feels the way I do. I wonder if he lies awake at night wondering if we made the right decision. Does he miss me? What we had? The way we made each other feel? Does he miss anything at all? Does he have someone next to him wishing it was me? I need to sleep. I can't think like this.

4:19 am

There's no way he's awake now. He has to wake up soon. He has a game tonight. I'm almost mad at him that I'm awake, tortured by memories of him and he's sleeping. I mindlessly type his number into a new message window. I shouldn't be doing this. I've gone six months without contacting him. This is a bad idea. I type message after message and delete them. Go to bed, I just need to go to bed.

I close out iMessage just to open it again once more. I feel pathetic, especially if I'm the only one feeling like this. I'm going to wind up humiliating myself. It doesn't seem like there's any stopping me at this point. I type his number into the message bar, type out a message, and send it along. I should throw my phone out of the window. What the hell is wrong with me? I should not have sent that.

My heart skips a beat when I get a notification that he sent a message back. I'm scared to look. My curiosity takes over and I reluctantly open the message.


	2. She’s spitting out the wine

[Tyler's POV]

I should have kicked her out hours ago. It's not even like she hasn't slept over here before, she has. I'm just not in the mood to have anyone else in my bed tonight. I'm having such a hard time falling asleep and I have a game. I have to wake up for morning skate in a few hours and I haven't even fallen asleep yet. The sex almost wasn't worth it. Almost.

She was a little tipsy on the wine we drank and I couldn't bring myself to be that heartless, even though I'm regretting it now. She didn't even like the wine. It wasn't even meant for her. It was meant for someone else, someone who was actually important to me. I thought this one was, but now I'm not so sure.

She only reminds me of what I used to have by being everything she wasn't. I find myself thinking about my ex tonight. If I was being honest I'd say she's on my mind most nights, but I choose to live in denial. Tonight I can't seem to shake the thoughts. Usually I can make them go away.

I look at the girl next to me. She might as well be invisible. I haven't spoken to my ex in the six months since we broke up. Tonight I may break the streak and text her. I don't really want to. I don't even know what I'd say. I know she's moved on and dating someone else. It wouldn't be right.

I look around on Instagram to pass the time. It's obvious I'm not falling asleep any time soon. I find myself in a vortex of puppy pictures, which I am perfectly ok with. I automatically check her profile out of habit. I don't even follow her anymore, but I still look her up to see how she's doing. I'm pathetic and would deny it until the day I die if questioned about it.

She hasn't posted anything in a week. When we were together she'd post at least once a day. She still has those pictures up and I can't stop myself from looking through them once again. I swear she looked happier when she was with me. Maybe it's in my head. Maybe I wish she was. I have no clue. All I know is I can't stop thinking about her and I miss her. The more I try to escape these feelings, the more alone I feel. None of these girls are helping. None of these girls are her.

I can't be in this bed with this girl anymore. I could try to sleep in one of the guest rooms, but I walk passed them all and walk out to my backyard. I turn the hot tub on and get in when it's ready. I don't even care that I'm in boxer briefs and not swim trunks. I didn't want to risk waking her up and wanting to join me out here.

As I look up at the sky I start to remember all of the good times my ex and I would have out here. They were some of my favorite memories with her. Some of my dirtiest memories with her. I remember this one time we were out here and had the best sex I've ever had. It started out innocent enough and escalated so quickly. She always drove me wild.

I need to think about something else. This is making it so much worse. There is a voice screaming in my head to text her or to call her just to hear her voice one more time. It's almost 4am, even if I wanted to it would be too late. That doesn't silence the voice, though. The voice doesn't care. The voice is getting louder and louder. I know she's the only one who could make me feel less alone.

It's the same voice that was telling me it was a bad idea to break up with her. I didn't listen. I thought I knew better. Maybe I was wrong. I have so many regrets. She has a boyfriend now. None of this matters. I have a girl up in my room that I should be lying next to.

I get out of the hot tub and shake my head at myself. I don't even have a towel to dry off. I sit on a lounge chair. I could see myself sleeping out here tonight. I lay my head back and close my eyes. I jump up when my phone goes off. I've gotten a text.


	3. I deleted your number

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The texts

Do you remember when we used to find the worst rated movies and watch them to see if we could get through the whole thing?

Tyler : um yeah

I just got through probably the worst one of them all.

Tyler : oh yeah? Cool

I'm sorry if I woke you. I thought you'd be sleeping.

Tyler : I wasn't sleeping

Ok good

Tyler : what's the name of the movie? I'll have to see if I can get through it.

You have way less patience than I do, there's not a chance you'll get through it.

Tyler : that sounds like a challenge to me

I don't know if I'd wish it on you

Tyler : just tell me

Surf School

Tyler : ok. I'll have to check it out on my day off

Good luck, it's pretty bad.

Tyler : surprised you're up

Can't sleep

Tyler : obviously

What about you? Don't you have a game?

Tyler : I do. Maybe I'll be able to sleep after morning skate

You've played on no sleep before

Tyler : I know, but I'd rather not.

I guess those sheets are faulty after all

Tyler : I doubt it's the sheets

Probably not

Tyler : You're still using them. Does the new guy know I bought them?

It hasn't come up.

Tyler : does he like them?

Sleeping like a baby

Tyler : I told you it's not the sheets.

Yeah, yeah

Tyler : I guess it's good someone is enjoying them

Tyler : I owe you a bottle of wine

You do?

Tyler : I didn't know I still had a bottle of that stuff you like. Had someone over and she tried it and spit it right out. She hated it.

Oh no. She must have terrible taste

Tyler : Hey!

In wine, you dope.

Tyler : I was about to say, you dated me so...

Don't worry about the wine. I didn't know it was there anyway.

Tyler : you sure?

Positive

Tyler : I'm out in the yard. Almost fell asleep out here

It is a nice night

Tyler : yeah. It's stupid. I can't even sleep in my own bed

The dogs took over again?

Tyler : no.

Oh. Got it. Kick her out, it's almost time for you to leave anyway.

Tyler : not close enough. There wouldn't be a point to me sleeping right now anyway

I'm in my own bed and still can't sleep

Tyler : wake him up and make him suffer with you. Ask for a massage. That always helps you

Nah. I'll let him sleep. He has work.

Tyler : never stopped you when you were with me

It was different then

Tyler : oh was it?

Yeah

Tyler : why was it different?

It just is

Tyler : he sucks at it, doesn't he?

I'm not answering that

Tyler : oh no, he does. I'm so sorry

Oh shut up

Tyler : I may be laughing over here

It's not funny

Tyler : I'm not laughing at you, just at him. He doesn't know what he's missing.

You're such an ass

Tyler : hope he's good with his hands in other areas at least

I'm ending this conversation

Tyler : no, no. don't

No? You want to talk to me?

Tyler : yeah, I do

Same

Tyler : I won't bring him up anymore

I won't either

Tyler : are you doing ok? Are you happy?

We don't have to go into it

Tyler : but I want to make sure you're happy

Yeah, I'm happy

Tyler : ok good. That's all that matters.

How have you been?

Tyler : been good. Always working on being better. The cup is ours this year.

I meant besides work, but I'm glad you're doing well

Tyler : Oh. I'm not in anything exclusive if that's what you're asking

I just want to know that you're happy too. We agreed when we broke up that we'd go and be happy.

Tyler : I haven't found anyone yet. I hate talking about this shit.

We don't have to. You brought it up.

Tyler : there's something I want to say, but I shouldn't

When has that ever stopped you before?

Tyler : I don't want to fight

Just say what you have to say

Tyler : you don't seem happy

Excuse me?

Tyler : I look at your pictures and I can just tell. We've known each other for four years. I can tell when you're not happy.

Took you a while to see it when we were together.

Tyler : this isn't about us. Don't get defensive. I worry.

How could you possibly know? We haven't spoken since we broke up.

Tyler : tell me I'm wrong then

You're wrong

Tyler : now tell me I'm wrong and actually mean it

Just drop it, ok?

Tyler : I can't

I need you to

Tyler : there's a reason you texted me

I miss you

Tyler : you do?

I shouldn't have said that

Tyler : Because you don't mean it or because you do?

Because I do

Tyler : I miss you too

Really?

Tyler : yup

Shit

Tyler : Why shit?

So many reasons, Ty.

Tyler : you should come to the game tonight

Don't you think that would be awkward?

Tyler : I mean alone

I'm not sure that's a good idea

Tyler : we obviously need to sit down and talk

I don't know

Tyler : you're not happy and I'm not happy. The last time we were happy is when we were together. Maybe we can be that for each other again.

I guess I could go

Tyler : it's just to talk, ok?

Yeah, ok

Tyler : I'll leave you a ticket

I can't wait

Tyler : I guess I should head back inside and get ready for morning skate

And kick the hoe out

Tyler : Lol, that too.

Don't fall asleep out on the ice

Tyler : I won't. See you tonight.

Yeah. See you tonight.


	4. Why are you here?

[Her POV]

After I stopped texting with Tyler my boyfriend woke up and got ready for work. Since I got no sleep I decided I'd be better off calling out from work rather than fighting to stay awake. Once I was alone in the house I closed the curtains in my room to block out the sun and got into bed. It wasn't long after my head hit the pillow that I fell asleep.

I feel a little guilty going to see Tyler alone, especially since I haven't really told my boyfriend. I don't plan to either. I want to see what happens first. Tyler said we would just be talking and I believe him. I can't believe I told him I miss him. It's not that I'm unhappy, I just know I could be happier. Maybe I'm just in denial.

I'm at a loss for what I'm going to wear. I'm staring at his jersey that hangs in my closet. Do I actually put it on? I'm going to go with no. Jeans and a nice top along with my hoodie seems like the smart choice.

For some reason I'm nervous. I shouldn't be. It's Tyler. We've known each other for four years, dated for three. There's nothing I should be nervous about. Maybe I'm more anxious than anything. I haven't seen him in so long. I'm not going to lie, I'm scared of how I'm going to feel when I see him.

I go to the box office to pick up my ticket. It's been so long since I've been here. It used to feel like the AAC was home. Not much has changed. I act like it's been years. It only feels like that.

The clerk hands me my ticket along with a family pass. The pass I used to wear proudly around my neck every game. This one's temporary, though, good for one game. The game day routine is starting to come back to me. I hang the family pass around my neck and get in line to go inside.

Warm ups are almost over and Tyler is by the goal trying to bat pucks out of the air. He looks so small from where I'm standing, but I swear my heart skipped a beat when I saw him.

Tyler has an amazing game consisting of multiple assists and goals. I can't help feeling proud of him even though he's not mine to be proud of anymore. I've been casually keeping up with the Stars and how he's been doing, not nearly as invested as I was when we were together. I don't even know when the last time is that I've sat down and watched a game. It seems as if nothing has changed. Life has gone on without me, which makes me question why I'm here and if I'm making a mistake.

Once the game ends I start the all too familiar walk down to the elevator to take to get downstairs to meet up with Tyler by the locker room. Luckily there is nobody else on the elevator but the attendant, who gives me a smile but doesn't question where I've been.

By the time I get downstairs most of the wives, girlfriends, friends, and family have already gotten there. I stand away from them even though they once were such a big part of my life. They look over at me once in a while and a few give me a polite wave. I can't even imagine what they're thinking of me right now. Well, I can, and none of it's good.

As the players start to file out of the locker room a lot of them give me a double take, not expecting me to be standing there. Again, I question if I should even be here. Most of them look away awkwardly, not knowing how to react. A few give me a wave or a head nod. It's not like Tyler and I ended on bad terms, but I could imagine they're confused. They're not alone.

I have my back turned to the locker room door when I hear a familiar French accent say my name. I turn around to see a smiling Antoine walking towards me. Of course he'd be the first person to talk to me. He's a sweetheart.

"Hey, Antoine, how are you?"

"Good. Long time, no see. You and Segs back together?"

"No, just...friends I guess."

"Oh sorry. I feel stupid."

"No, please don't."

"It's good to see you again." He hugs me.

"You too, Antoine. How are the little ones?"

"Great, growing so fast. Raphaelle is walking now and Theo won't shut up."

"Oh, so like you."

He smiles. "Yup!" He's so proud.

"Give Alexandra my best."

"I will. She will be bummed she missed you."

Tyler walks out of the locker room with Tom Holy and they walk straight to the kids who were in the Seguin's Stars suite. I can't take my eyes off of him. He looks so good and he's wearing my favorite suit, which I am sure is not a coincidence. I return my attention to Antoine, who is looking at me with a smirk on his face.

"Don't start."

"I didn't say anything." His smirk turns into a full blown smile. "I have to get home. It was great seeing you again. Don't be a stranger, ok?" He motions his head in Tyler's direction.

"I don't know about that."

"We will have to see then. Goodnight."

Antoine starts walking towards the garage and I go back to watching Tyler. I always love to watch him with the kids.

After he signs autographs and takes pictures he shakes hands with Tom and starts making his way over to me. His smile grows wider the closer he gets to me, I smile back. I can't stop myself. It really is good to see him again. He wraps me up in a hug and says hello into my hair. I return the hug and bury my face into his chest. He rubs his hand up and down my back a few times before we break apart.

"You look great. You cut your hair. It looks amazing," he says as he steps back to look at me.

"Thanks. I wasn't sure about the length at first but I love it. I'm surprised you do. You love long hair."

"It's you so..." He blushes and looks down at the floor.

"Your hair is looking fabulous. I told you the longer length suits you."

"I love it, but it's a pain in the ass to maintain."

"Worth it, though, I'm sure the ladies love it."

"I guess."

"So, where are we going? I'm parked in the Lexus garage. I'll meet you there."

"I was thinking we pick something up and eat at my house," he says as he rubs the back of his head.

"I'm not sure that's a good idea."

"I just figured it would be quieter that way. More private. Less distractions."

"Exactly."

"I just want to talk."

"I know, but we still shouldn't."

"Why? Because you're worried you won't be able to stop yourself?"

"Um no."

"I think that's it. You won't be able to hold back. You can't resist me."

"Oh please, Tyler, don't be a cocky asshole."

He laughs. "I dunno, you seem scared."

"I'm not scared."

"Then what's the big deal?"

"Ugh fine, let's go back to your place."

"Is Chipotle ok? I can get your usual and you can go straight to my place. I'll give you the key to go in. The boys will be so happy to see you."

"You remember my usual?"

"Of course. It's been six months, not six years."

I hold my hand out for the key. "Ok, I'll meet you at home. I mean your house." He places the key in my hand. His hand quickly brushes against mine. It was only a moment, but it was a feeling I haven't felt in so long. The ends of his lips curl up but it quickly fades.

"See you in a bit."

"Nice touch with the suit, by the way."

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Mhmm, see you in a bit."

We both go our separate ways to our cars. I head over to his house while he picks up the food. It probably would have been smarter if I picked up the food and he went straight home, but he never would have let me pay.

It's a little surreal driving to his place, something I didn't think I'd ever do again. The route seems so familiar, but so foreign at the same time. I pull up to the house and have to take a few minutes to gather myself together. I almost have to will myself to get out of the car.

Once I finally drag myself out of the car I open the door and am immediately greeted by three labs. I've missed them so much. Gerry cries out and jumps on me as soon as he sees that it's me. I have tears in my eyes. I love all 3 of them, but Gerry holds a special place in my heart. Tyler and I picked him together. He was my son just as much as he is Tyler's. "Hi, baby boy," I say as I rub my face into his. He feverishly kisses my face. I hug around his neck before standing up and composing myself. Tyler will be home any minute and I don't want him to see that I was crying.

I let them out into the backyard and look in Tyler's fridge for something to drink. There's not much to choose from. Beer or water. I go with water, the safer choice.

It's like clockwork. Tyler opens the door once I get the table set. The dogs go running to greet him. "Hey boys, I bet you weren't expecting to see mommy." He stops himself, realizing what he just said. "Sorry, I wasn't thinking."

"It's fine."

He places the bag down on the table. "I'm going to go change. I'll be right back."

"I'll take everything out in the meantime." He smiles at me before turning to leave the room. He stops in the doorway and looks back at me. "What?"

"Nothing." He shakes it off and continues his way out of the room.

And just like that I've fallen back into a routine. It's just like old times. There's a sense of normalcy, even though this hasn't been my normal in so long. I put Tyler's food at his spot at the table and my food in mine across from him. I sit down and wait for Tyler to come back. Gerry lies down by my feet. He hasn't left my side since I've arrived. He's going to make me cry again.

Tyler comes into the room and sits down. "I got you that extra rice and chips. I know how you like to dip the chips into the rice. Verde right?"

"Yeah that's right. Wow, thanks. You didn't have to."

"It's no problem." He sticks his fork into his burrito bowl. "Were the dogs happy to see you?"

"Yeah they were. I was happy to see them too."

"I think they may miss you too." I look down, a little sad. "Hey, no, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said anything. I know it's been hard."

"It really has been. Not just because of them."

"That's why we're here, right?"

"Yeah."

"Did you tell your boyfriend?"

"No."

"Oh. That's probably not good."

"I know, I know."

"Well, it's just going to be talk anyway so..."

"Exactly. I didn't want to upset him for no reason. I wanted to see how this went."

"Keeping your options open."

"No, I'm just a coward."

"Don't worry about it."

"I have to. I don't even know what I'm doing here."

"Yeah you do. You just don't want to admit it."

"There's gotta be something wrong with me. He's not a bad guy. He's a really great guy, actually. I should be happy."

"He probably does make you happy, just not the kind of happy you're used to."

"Yeah, maybe. It doesn't matter. I'm not here to talk about him anyway."

"Why are you here?"

"You know why."

"I want to hear you say it."

"To eat Chipotle."

"Smart ass." He sounds annoyed, but he has a smile on his face. "The actual reason."

"Because I miss you. Because even though we thought breaking up was the best thing for us, it wasn't. Because I'm not happy, not at all. Because I smiled more during our late night text the other night than I have in the last six months. Because I need you back in my life. Because you make me happy. The kind of happy I'm used to. The kind of happy I want. The only kind of happy I need. That's why I'm here. Why are you here?"

"I live here."

"Tyler..."

He smiles. "I know. Sorry. I'll be serious." He takes a deep breath. "You were a smart ass first, though."

"Ok, you have a point there."

"First off, I miss you too. I've been trying to fill the void you left, comparing every girl to you. None of them were even close. I've been searching for something that doesn't exist, someone who could make me even half as happy as you made me. Make me, I should say. Sure, we are a mess sometimes, but we're the perfect mess. I've been keeping track of your posts on Instagram. I've never been able to let go. I stayed away because I thought it was best for you. I'm what's best for you, though, I know that now. And you're what's best for me. I want to give this another go...if that's what you want."

"I need to go."

"What? Why?"

"I have to break up with him."

He tries to fight a smile but fails. It spreads from ear to ear. "Don't go tonight. Do it tomorrow."

"It should be now."

He hugs me. "Stay here tonight, not for anything bad, just to be together." He lets me go and looks at me, begging me with his eyes to agree to stay. He's hard to resist. Impossible really.

"Ok, I'll stay."

"Good. I'll give you something to sleep in and we can cuddle. Maybe we could get a decent night's sleep for once."

We change and get into bed. This should feel wrong, but it doesn't. This is the most relaxed I've felt in such a long time.

"This is still my favorite place in the world," I say.

"I'm glad you think so." He kisses my temple.

"We were kidding ourselves when we thought we could live without each other."

"I don't think there was a moment in the last six months that I thought we made the right decision."

"You should have told me."

"I was giving you space. I knew you were torn. I didn't want to make it worse."

"It was stupid of me to get into another relationship when I did. I wasn't ready. I just thought if I put it off now, I'll always put it off. Moving on, I mean, like there was even a chance that was going to happen."

"We thought we were doing the right thing."

"I put off texting you for so long the other night before I buckled down and sent it."

"It's a good thing you did."

"Yeah, we have another chance to get it right this time. Another chance at happiness."

"You know what, I don't care that you still technically have a boyfriend right now." He lifts my chin up and leans into kiss me. We both smile as we pull away. "Perfection."

"You're so corny."

"You know you bring it out of me."

"Oh please, you've always been corny. Do you remember how we met?"

"Don't remind me."

"But it's one of my favorite stories."

He covers his face with both hands. "I don't know what I was thinking."

"I'm the moron who fell for it."

He moves his hands and smiles. "True, you laughed so hard."

"I heard that guy is a good kisser," I say in a mocking tone, "would you like to find out?"

"No, stop."

"It's a wonder why we were just friends first for so long," I say sarcastically, "who could resist that charm?"

"You didn't completely turn me down."

"I admired the complete lack of shame."

"I was all alone in a new city. I needed a friend."

"No, you needed to get laid."

"And you didn't help me out with that."

"I couldn't let you think that was an acceptable way of talking to someone."

"It did work, though."

"You're lucky I'm a sucker for a cute smile and dorky personality."

"Hey! I'm not dorky."

"Still in denial, I see."

"So mean," he pouts.

"You know I love you."

"I love you too." He squeezes me tight.

"I'm not sure how much longer I can fight sleep."

He rubs my back. "Don't fight it."

"I should have known that this is all I needed."

"We are together now. No use in wasting time on regrets."

"You're right."

I close my eyes and in the first time in six months I fall asleep right away.


	5. I win

[Tyler's POV]

I don't think I've been so anxious in my life. She's over her boyfriend's place right now to break up with him. Part of me is worried he's going to convince her to stay with him. There's nothing I can do but sit here and wait. It's driving me crazy. I can't lose her again. Last night just confirmed to me that we belong together. There's nobody in this world I could love more than her. I can't wait until she comes back and we can start a new chapter together.

I had practice today and all I could think about was getting to see her again. It's like I've fallen in love all over again. Of course the guys were asking me about her being at the game and I told them we were seeing about getting back together. They know how happy she's made me and how much of a struggle its been to push her out of my mind. Thankfully I don't have to do that anymore.

I'm having dinner delivered so we can sit down and have a nice, quiet dinner together. It doesn't feel like we've missed a beat, but I know there are things we need to talk about. We can't act like we will be back to the way it was just like that. I'm willing to do whatever it takes. She's everything to me.

I feel stupid just sitting here and staring at the door, waiting for her to come back. I've tried to keep myself occupied but nothing has worked. She's finally here, I can hear her fumbling with her keys outside the door. I get up and open the door for her. She smiles when she sees me. "I left it open for you."

"What's stupid is I don't have the key to the house anymore. Old habits and all. I'm so embarrassed."

"I wasn't going to say anything." She walks in and past me and sits on the couch. I join her. "So, um, did you do it?"

She nods, "Yeah."

"Are you ok?"

"Yeah, I think he knew it was coming."

"Do you need anything from me? I don't know how to be in this situation."

"Just a hug."

"I can do that."

I wrap my arms around her and hold her close to me. I nuzzle into her hair, taking the all too familiar scent of her shampoo in. It has become such as comforting scent. She rests her head on my chest and I stroke her hair. This has been something I've been missing more than anything. I kiss her temple a few times.

"Dinner should be here soon."

"Oh good, I'm starving. I didn't eat lunch. My stomach was in knots all day."

"Sorry about that."

"It was bound to happen sooner or later."

"I was worried you'd change your mind, or that he would change it for you."

"No. You're stuck with me for good this time."

I smile. "I'll learn how to manage."

She looks up at me and smiles. After all these years knowing her, her smile still makes my heart skip a beat and even more so when I'm the reason she's smiling. I made her laugh the first time we met and I was hooked then and there. She flipped my world upside down with that smile.

She starts to say something but is interrupted by the doorbell ringing. "I'll go set the table." She quickly kisses me before heading off to the dining room. The dogs follow behind her.

We sit down to eat and everything feels right. It's back to the way it's supposed to be. I watch her across the table. Is she going to start the conversation or am I going to have to? I'm trying to gauge her mood. Maybe tonight shouldn't be the night. She just dumped someone.

"It's not like we weren't happy when we were together," she says out of nowhere. She's obviously been thinking about how to start just as much as I have.

"I think we had our priorities screwed up."

"We were still living separately despite living together."

"We need to be more like a team."

"Yeah. You also started putting everything before me."

It stings to hear, but she's right. I hang my head in shame. "I know. I'm sorry."

"I need to be better at communicating to you. That was my fault."

"I think that we can agree that both of us have communication issues."

"Yeah."

"Whatever it is we need to work on I'm willing to do that. I can't lose you again."

"Same goes for me. I'm going to be less stubborn."

I laugh. "Ok, let's not get carried away."

She throws a fry across the table at me. "Shut up, jerk."

I pick the fry up with a smile and pop it into my mouth. "You'll come first from now on, I promise." She looks up at me with a smirk because of how sexual that sounded. I pick up on it. "Pervert."

"You said it."

"You know I didn't mean it like that...although..." I raise my eyebrows up and down suggestively and laugh.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, you have stamina. We get it."

"Someone sounds bitter. Have you been deprived?"

"No."

"Ok good, because if the guy is bad at massages and can't last long in bed I'd suggest for him to hand in his man card."

She puts her hand in front of her face. "Let's not talk about him anymore, please."

"Sorry, you're right."

"Thanks, I appreciate it."

"It just bothers me a bit that he's been the one lately."

"Jealous?"

"Not exactly."

"You have nothing to be jealous about, really. Now can we drop it?"

"Dropping it."

We continue to eat and talk about anything but her recent sex life. We catch each other up on how things have been going in our lives. She tells me how after she moved out she moved in with her sister and how that lasted a week before she drove her crazy which lead to her moving into her own apartment, where she's living now. I tell her how Gerry started acting out after she moved out and how I almost dropped him off with her because he wouldn't behave and would cry at night missing her. Our breakup wasn't just hard on us, but our kids too. Dogs don't understand and there's no way to explain it to them. She reaches down and pets Gerry's head, letting him know that she's here now.

After we finish dinner, we make our way to the media room. I plop down on the couch and she sits down next to me. I slip my arm around her back and she leans into me. This feels no natural. It feels so good to be holding her again.

"I have the perfect shitty movie to put on."

She looks up at me and smiles. "Sounds good to me."

"Before I put it on I have something to ask you." She continues to look at me. "So, um, I know we have been talking about being together but I haven't officially asked you to be my girlfriend again. I want it to be official, so will you?"

"Of course, cover boy." Her pet name for me. Something I haven't heard in so long. Even when we were together she stopped calling me that towards the end.

"That's not something I've heard in forever."

"Should we start all the way over or..."

"I don't think we should move back in together right away, but we have too much history to start at the beginning again."

"Yeah."

I lie back onto a pillow and she lies beside me with her head resting on my chest. I play with her hair as I scroll through Netflix to select the movie. One of my favorite things is watching terrible movies with her. It's usually when we laugh the most together. We make fun of the bad acting and dialogue. We make it a contest. Who can last the longest before asking to turn the movie off? It's usually her. I found an extra terrible movie today, so it should be a good time.

I know that we had our problems in our relationship, but being here in this moment it's hard to remember why we broke up at all. This feels so right. I've never felt like this when I was with any other girl. We are meant to be together and I think the time we spent apart taught us that. We both are incredibly proud and stubborn and we let that get in the way of what's really important.

I can tell she feels the same way. She's so relaxed in my arms. We have six months to make up for and I don't mind trying to make up for them in one day. This is exactly where I want to be and who I want to be with.

"The acting is terrible," she says as we are about 20 minutes into the movie.

"I could do a better job."

She laughs. "Ok, Ty."

"What? You don't think I can?"

"You're...you...just stick to hockey."

I pout. "So mean. You're supposed to be supportive."

"The most supportive thing I could do for you is not let you act."

I take my arm out from around her and act like I'm hurt. I know she's right. I am a terrible actor. "No more cuddles then." I sit up, letting her head fall to the couch cushion.

"Oh come on, I was comfortable!" she whines.

"That's what you get." She tries to sit up and I playfully push her back down. "No, stay here."

She pushes me back. "You're asking for it."

"What are you going to do, eh?" I love getting her riled up. She gets so frustrated and it's so cute. She gets this scowl on her face that she thinks is so tough, but it's just adorable.

"Tickle you to death then post the video online so all your fans can see."

"You're evil."

She smiles proudly which makes me smile back. I couldn't stop myself even if I tried. "You know I wouldn't do that," she says after some silence.

"I know. You always respect my privacy, our privacy."

"Your fans are going to have some words to say when they find out we're back together."

"Yeah but you know I don't pay any mind to that stuff, and I know you don't either."

"It's not like it ever stopped."

I hang my head. "I've seen."

"Don't worry about it."

"There's plenty of them who like us together too."

"I don't care what any of them think."

"I know." I kiss her temple.

We continue to watch the movie and something unexpected happens, something funny actually happens. I throw my head back with laughter. It's a hard belly laugh. I'm hysterical and I look over at her and she is too. Her laugh is music to my ears. I continue to laugh and admire her until she looks at me and notices I've been staring. Our laughter starts to taper off and eventually stops. We don't break eye contact, we both continue to smile.

"I love you," she says, "I know that we're supposed to be starting over, but I can't hold it in any longer. I love you so much."

"I love you too. I've never stopped." I kiss her like it's our first and last kiss. I kiss her so she knows my words are true. She kisses me back with that same passion. "Screw starting over. Come back home. Move back in with me and the boys. We need you. If you don't go and pack up your shit I'm going to do it for you."

"Are you sure that's what you want?"

"I've never been more sure of anything in my life. Please come back home."

"Ok, Ty, I'll move back in."

I hug her so tight. "We're going to do it right this time."

"You can still pack for me if you want." She smiles.

"Anything that will get you here faster."

"Let's go right now."

"You don't want to finish the movie?"

"Hell no."

"I win."


End file.
